Bring the T-Pain (Or, Why My Brother-In-Law Is Awesome)
lillet: maybe you want to check out these lyrics
bro-in-law: When I Whisper In Ya Ear
Ya Legs Hit The Chandleer
Classy. It's funny. in the comments, everyone says how ugly the guy is. He must think so too, since his whole come-on is "I have money. I have a Cadillac. Sleep with me."
He's like MC Low Self-Esteem
lillet: Well he's MC Low Ceilings, anyway
if his date's legs are hitting the "Chandleer"
bro-in-law: maybe he's MC Inept Do-It-Your-Selfer, and he just installed the
chandaleer without adjusting the chain length
so it hangs three feet above the bed.
lillet: Maybe he needs to cut a record with MC Home Depot
get some shizit done around the hizzouse
bro-in-law: I thought Ace was the place with the helpful hardware MC
lillet: Ace of Basement
bro-in-law: Got my glue gun strapped and I'm ready to pop a cap in some drywall
lillet: Then gonna take me a nap and then maybe play me some foosball
I'm the Ace of Basement
I'll fix yo' casement
Seems yo' drywall is needing REPLACEMENT
bro-in-law: how bout some cabinet REFACIN'?
lillet: a new BASIN
for that sink by the mirror that you see yo' FACE IN?
bro-in-law: and a chrome WASTE BIN for that room where you be TASTIN'
bro-in-law: Get me the protractor, and we'll do some TRACIN'
lillet: Oh shit! Yo' foundation be needing some BRACIN'
bro-in-law: But first check yo Timberlands. They need LACIN'
lillet: Ace of Basement, he got no time to be HATIN
Cause he sees yo' attic needs some INSULATIN
bro-in-law: You want new shingles? We could put some SLATE IN
lillet: Yo, step aside, as I'm backing my RIDE IN
My Escalade's holding some 'LUMINUM SIDIN'
bro-in-law: That's a crib to take some PRIDE IN
lillet: One R. Kelly would live wit' an underage BRIDE IN
bro-in-law: A place where a ho could be PLIED in (with alcohol)
bro-in-law: A place where yo ass can get WIDE IN
lillet: Where your chronic can HIDE IN
bro-in-law: A place you won't be TRIED IN
lillet: A place where you all your peeps are INVITIN
bro-in-law: where only the dogs are FIGHTIN' (Michael Vick's place)
bro-in-law: where the chandeleer needs HIGHTIN"
(and we're full circle)
only took 54 minutes!